I bought my first house at the tender age of 23. I was single and had just made E4. I was anxious to move out of the base dorms and have more space and freedom. As much as I loved moving into my first house, I think I would have waited. I think I was a little blinded by the potential to receive more money just for living off-base. Keep in mind, this was awhile before Housing Allowances were as (proportionally) high as they are now. When I received my BAH, it covered only 3/4 of my living expenses. My gross monthly pay was about $1400 and my monthly BAH was about $300. After taxes and other deductions, my take-home was about $1100. My mortgage was $840. Plus there was the cost of Maslow's other needs, frivolities, and a credit card (or three). I don't remember the cost of upkeep and maintenance but I do remember paying $2000 to remove five or six very large Fir trees from the yard because they were in close proximity to the house.
When I moved to Japan, for three years, I kept the house and an aunt moved into it. She paid the utilities. I paid for everything else. Thankfully, my living expenses in Japan were covered by an Overseas Housing Allowance and a Utility Allowance but the stateside mortgage wasn't covered. Even so, I was able to pay off the credit card debt that had followed me to Japan. However, that victory was short-lived because, when I moved back to the States, the discontinuance of those Overseas Allowances cut my take-home by 25%. I wasn't able to live in the dorms so I HAD to live off-base. I found an apartment as soon as I got to Dover. I also bought a car because, well, getting to/from work was important. So, moving back Stateside netted me monthly rent, a car payment, and utilities again ALONG WITH the mortgage that I was still paying.
A year after I arrived in Delaware, I began looking for a new house to buy. The high-density establishments (read: apartments) in Dover aren't great. They are far overpriced for the amenities that you (DON'T) get. My goal was to find a house that cost less than the combined payments of my mortgage and my rent. That wasn't too difficult considering those two items totaled more than $1600. I found a house, bought it using an 80/20 Conventional loan, and moved in during February 2007. Thankfully, in the years between the two purchases, my gross pay had increased to $2600 per month and BAH to just under $500.
Two months after I moved in, I had eight windows replaced. They were old, metal-framed storm windows and were super inefficient. They cost me nearly $9000 but I imagine I've saved at least that amount in energy costs since the air isn't whooshing out giant "holes" in the walls. That was the first of many expenses incurred for this house.
Since then, home improvement costs have ran the gamut:
$380 in 2010 to install ceiling fans in two bedrooms, install lighting in the attic, and reroute some electrical conduit.
$3130 in 2014 to install Gutter Guard on all the rain gutters (now debris goes over the gutter rather than getting stuck in it).
$1875 also in 2014 to make improvements to the a/c system that would not have been needed to be made if it had been installed correctly to begin with.
$2849 in 2015 to install wood-look tile in the kitchen, dining room, laundry room, 1st floor bathroom, and front entry.
That's more than $17,000 spent in just eight years and that doesn't include the revamp to my front yard where I replaced my postage stamp patch of grass with river rock and a short stone wall border. I think that was another $2000 or $3000, back in 2013.
Those were all done while I was Active Duty and making a nice chunk of change. That chunk changed when I retired in 2016. My take-home income drop by 2/3 that year though, in 2017, it did increase some when my Disability kicked in but the maintenance and upkeep on the house has yet to slow down.
$4999 in 2016 on new attic windows (the old ones were the originals, I think) and roof repair.
$4926 in 2017 on new front and kitchen doors.
Having a 200 year old house makes for increased labor charges because NOTHING on the house is plumb.
So...that brings the total spent to about $30,000 in 12 years. That doesn't include the $1600 to get rid of the termites in the cellar and wood-boring beetles in the attic in 2016. Nor does it include the, roughly, $10,000 that I've spent on yard maintenance, replacement appliances, and other nit-noid repair and upkeep items. That brings the total to more than $40,000. I will share that I have additional preventative maintenance in the works. My two a/c systems and my water heater are approaching the end of their lifespans. Replacing them is next in the works. That's another $15,000-$23,000 for everything.
I will concede that I do tend to choose to pay for great customer service and, therefore, might pay more than the average person for these things but, even if I chose the less-expensive options, it's still a chunk of money invested in the house.
None of these would be MY expenses in a rental. With that, I'll never own again. I would rather spend $40,000 on experiences and time with friends and family than on a house that isn't my final abode.
